How do you deal with “Holiday Overwhelm”?
The key? A healthy relationship with time, along with healthy boundaries and assertive communication with others about your time helps reduce stress and will generate more time for the things you love – during the holiday season and throughout the entire year!!
Practice these tips now to complete the 2019 Holiday Season with a “Happy Heart” and use them to make 2020 your best year ever!
Time and Your Schedule – Is your schedule managing you?
Remember: you’re in charge– own your commitments, take charge of your time including your calendar and your happiness!
- Remember that there are only so many hours in the day. This means that whatever you choose to take on limits your ability to do other things. So even if you somehow can fit a new commitment into your schedule, if it’s not more important than what you would have to give up to do it (including time for relaxation and self-care), you really don’t have the time in your schedule.
- Einstein Time – you’re the source of time. You decide what to spend your time on. It’s not out there being put upon you and you’re not a victim of time. When you say you don’t have time for something, you’re really saying you don’t have time for that! Own it! The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks
- Focus on the most important. According to the Pareto Principle (the 80:20 rule) 80% of your results are produced by 20% of your efforts. What are your 20% results, actions, activities, relationships? There will always be more to do. How will you focus on what matters most to you?
- Know Your Best Time –are you a morning person, a night owl? When do you do your best work? Don’t spend your best time, wasting time.
Get real about Incompletions and other Tolerations; Get complete regularly.
Tolerating incomplete stuff zaps energy and contributes to holiday overwhelm. To create space for creating new possibilities, conversations and actions, practice getting complete regularly.
- Get Real About Incomplete Items. What you said you would do; what others asked you to do; what you expect, need or want to do; what others expect, need or want to do.
- Incomplete Items Inventory. To deal with it and get straight about completion, make a list of everything not complete, write it all down on paper, and plan to get complete: do it now, schedule it to be done, or get straight, agree to not do it and call it complete.
Manage Healthy Boundaries – where we draw the line with others! One way to pare down your schedule is to get good at saying “no” to new commitments. Learning to say “no” to requests can be one of the biggest favors you can do for yourself and those you love. It helps reduce stress levels and gives you time for what’s most important.
- Maintain Balance in our schedules and our lives. We tend to take on more responsibilities than we’re comfortable with, just to please others. If we don’t respect our own limits, how can we expect others to respect them?
- Minimize Conflict. We tend to feel frustrated and resentful when we say “yes” to things better addressed with a “no.” Maintaining healthy boundaries lets others know where they stand with us, and can allow us to avoid causing additional conflicts in our relationships due to resentments and other negative feelings caused by poor boundaries.
- Promotes Closeness. Healthy boundaries allow us to have closer relationships that respect all involved. Allowing others to get close to us, without overwhelming us, is the true goal of boundary setting. It is a misperception keeping others at arms-length is having, strong healthy boundaries.
Communicate Assertively with Others.
- Be firm — not defensive or overly apologetic — and polite. This gives the signal that you’re sympathetic, and will not easily change your mind if pressured.
- If you decide to tell the person you’ll get back to them, be matter-of-fact and not too promising. If you lead people to believe you’ll likely say “yes” later, they’ll be more disappointed with a later “no.”
- If asked for an explanation, remember that you really don’t owe anyone one. “It doesn’t fit with my schedule,” is perfectly acceptable.
So, what’s stopping you from doing these Tips today?
“If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done!” – Thomas Jefferson
What one thing will you take on for the remainder of 2019 to have a Happy Heart and enjoy the holidays?
- Manage your time differently
- Complete and Plan each week
- Commit to completing 2019 and planning 2020
- Act consistent with commitments
- Commit time and money to have the future fulfilled
- Recalibrate mindset to get past your limiting beliefs
- Make time for you – do something every day that brings you joy
- Take care of yourself
- Use accountability structures to support your success journey
Wishing you the best of the holiday season and a prosperous New Year! – Tyra